Key2 See the needs behind every action 了解每个行为背后的需求
First of all, let’s Learn to differentiate a need from a strategy.
Eg1：” wanting a iPad ” is not a need, it’s just the need for fun, but there are a lot of ways to have fun….
Eg2: Forcing your child to be in bed is a strategy for meeting his need for rest and yours. 强行让孩子上床睡觉是为了满足他和你休息需求的策略。
Secondly, make a list of universal needs and post it in the house where everyone can see it, refer to it, and add to it.
Tell yourself pleasurable feelings give the message that your needs are being fulfilled, on the other hands, painful feelings give the message that some needs are not being fulfilled.告诉你自己愉快的感觉传达出你的某种需求被满足，另一方面，伤痛的感觉传达了某些需求没被满足。
Not judge any action first, please hear them.